Goodbye Nala (graphic warning)

 

The past 22hrs have been excruciating. 22hrs ago we were sitting down to a late dinner after helping buck hay. Ramen Noodles, the dinner of champions, ya know. We heard this HORRIBLE noise. None of us had a clue what it was. Someone said "It sounds like someone is dieing. Little did we know it was OUR dog! Scott went out to investigate. He was gone for a few minutes and when he came in, he had this look. I said "Do I need to come?". "yes" was the answer I popped up and threw shoes on. When I went outside I saw a car in the middle of the road with a dog BEHIND it. My thought was it was Danny and Nala was sitting there worried. When I went up the boy (17) driving said "she ran out in front of us". It took a minute to realize he was refering to my dog. She was on the ground mangled. Her back legs were a twisted mess. Not much blood but you could hear her troubled breathing. I thought the problem was just her legs. Later I found out differently.

The poor lady with her son got out to help Nala and Nala traumatized reacted with adrenaline and bit her badly. The lady was part of the noise we heard, the other part was Nala being burned by the exhaust system UNDER the car. Michael and Lisa (my dear neighbors and brother in law and sister in law) took Debbie in and treated her wounds. She was going into shock, both for the wounds and what she had witnessed.

This morning I found out what had happened. She darted out in front of them. She can run super fast in a playful mood. I'm thinking she and Danny (M&Ls Dog) had been playing in the yards and she caught eye of something on the other side of the road and took off after it and didn't stop for the car. They couldn't stop in time and she went all the way under the car and the stopped when she was under the exhaust system. She was howling in pain and from the heat. Once they moved she stopped howling. THat is when Debbie when in to help. PSA: NEVER APPROACH AN INJURED ANIMAL.

Debbie spent several hours in the ER last night while we were at the Animal Urgent Care in Orem. I think we got there by 9, 45min after the accident. They did X-rays and found she hips and back were NOT broken but dislocated. I began to have hope until they showed us the x-ray of her chest. It was full of blood!!! The doctor said "That is NOT life threatening (referring to the hip) BUT, this IS". My heart sank. At that point I had no clue she had gone under the low riding BMW. I still thought she has been hit by the front bumper. I had no clue. She had no rectal temp and she was not responding to pain so my fear had been her back was broken.

I should have known it was worse because her breathing was SO labored. I thought it was from shock though. It got worse and her breathing stopped and the gave her cpr (how do you give a dog cpr??) but they could not get her back. Her body had had enough. The doctor said the 3 pain meds they administered weren't working enough and they could not get her settled. Scott was over at Sonic getting us drinks when they came out and told me. I was alone and needed Scott! I walked over and told Scott.

The prognosis was bad either way. If she lived it was possible that there was so much damage done to her spinal cord that she may not walk again, then we probably would have put her down. She is a dog who loves to run, CLIMB and jump, she would NOT be happy as a couch dog. Instead her lungs filled with blood and her internal injuries were too extensive and it prevented us from even being able to make that choice.

I know my kids were at home praying she would be okay. They had no idea what the damage was. I told them it was her legs and to me that was fixable. i feel horrible for them thinking their prayers were not answered. We have talked extensively about asking that "HIS will be done". Wise Lindsey did make the distinction today that "it was better for her to pass" knowing her injuries better today.

It has been a long day today. I know Nala does NOT have rabies but since I have a in family vet I have gotten free shots for years!!! Unfortunately I don't have records. I can't prove she is current. Since she died they wanted to test her. They test ALL deceased canines involved in bite cases. The clincher there is they have to test the brain and they don't take the whole body and give it back. They remove the head and get rid of the body. The body just takes up space. So at lunchtime today I found out they needed Nala's HEAD. We brought her home to bury her today. So a nice Deputy came and took her away and brought her back in a bag without a head!!!!! This kills me!!! My baby without a head. I didn't look in the bag so for all I know she isn't in there and I buried some one else's animal. Her new home is under a tree in the pasture.

I haven't cried for long. I cry A LOt but only in short spurts. I haven't had much time alone. Writing this is the longest I have been alone for minus sleep (what I got of that). I have been mad, mostly at the insurance people. I hate that I have to handle them. I have issue with the SF agent that called and didn't even say "I'm sorry for your loss". She was short with me and when I said "I DID lose my dog when your clients hit my dog" she as "oh I know". UGH! So my insurance is paying for her ER visit and any follow up because she was dumb enough to reach down and try to help her. See...I'm angry. I would have done the same thing though. I hate that the car was a BMW and rode low and that my dog RAN out in front of a car at night. I'm mad at the dumb situation! Why could she have NOT been inside like she normally is at that time of night? UGH!

I want everything the way it was 24hrs ago please. I want my Nala back!!! I want the grave in my back yard to be gone and I want to step on my dog's nose in the morning like I do every morning. I want to not feel the hole I have in my heart. I want it to be filled again. I know it will get better and I am praying hard for comfort. It seems to be fleeting though.